I'm back and I'm annoyed. Part of my disposition probably has to do with the fact that the Redskins suck, have a horrible owner, and will continue to suck until he sells the team! Part of my disposition probably has to do with my 22 year old offspring who "just doesn't get it!" But neither of those are the source of today venom.
I really get annoyed at people who attack celebrities for no reason at all. Few people deserve to be attacked as it is, but I hate when people take shots at someone simply because it's a celebrity.
I am really sick of how people are reacting to the David Letterman admission of sex issue. What do you want from him?? I mean, instead of lying about it like many folks have, he didn't succumb to the extortion, co-operated with authorities and came clean with his viewers. Would they rather he lied about it and paid to have it all go away? What would've been the better way to have handle it?
I'm sick of hearing him ridiculed for "taking advantage of staff members." I've watched the video of what he said...I've read police accounts about the investigation, and at NO point has it been mentioned that anyone was taken advantage of. Why is it that when a man has sex with one of his employees, he's instantly crucified for doing something wrong? Maybe they were acts between consenting adults. Maybe she took advantage of him. Maybe she had a habit of showing up naked on his desk every Friday at 9:05am. The fact is, we don't know!!
Why did he apologize? Maybe it was because he knew the feeding frenzy that would occur if any of the media found out about someone else he was having sex with. By most accounts, David Letterman is a private kinda guy, so he's probably sensitive to guarding other people's privacy. Whether consensual or not, some people don't like their business all out there. Maybe he was apologizing to those women for the privacy invasion that is sure to follow.
The fact is that none of us knows what really happened and I am sick of people instantly jumping to assume the worse of others, and perpetuating potentially unsubstantiated innuendo.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Friday, July 24, 2009
Police Behavior...Part 2
...however, reading in the police report that he yelled something in reference to how a Black man gets treated in America, sounds like there is a "history" there.
To me, there are three possibilities as to what happened in this case: a) ID was produced and police acted inappropriately, b) ID was not produced, police acted appropriately, and Mr Gates is throwing out the "race card" to try to get out of the situation, or c) police acted appropriately in THIS situation, but Mr Gates behaved out of past frustration. The more that I look at the facts as I have seen them, I am starting to think that Option C is most likely.
Having a lot of diverse friends from many races and cultures, I like to generally think in terms of ways that we are all similar in many experiences that we share. I usually prefer to think of the America of 2009 as being so much easier for me, as a Black man, than it was for my parents. Much more of American society embraces racial equally than ever before. However, we can't forget that we are only one generation removed from government mandated racism, so we can't be completely surprised when racism rears its ugly head today. In my forty years, there have been several occasions where I, and people I know, have been detained by law enforcement when doing nothing wrong. I've had an officer draw his gun on me, thinking I was the criminal, when I was the one reporting the incident. So...it happens...it does happen.
And the unfortunate truth is that when something like that happens, more often than not, the fraternity of police sticks together. This is in NO way an indictment of all, or even most police officers. I'm sure that most of them go about doing their jobs in the proper fashion. However, there are some out there who abuse their authority to perpetuate their racist views, and it's really hard to get one officer to speak out against another. To me, it sounds like Mr Gates may have had some previous dealings with police that may have been unfair, and when this situation occurred, he reacted to his history of treatment, and not so much to the incident at hand.
Again...that's just my opinion. None of us knows exactly what happened in Cambridge. So remember that before you rush to judge either party in the situation.
To me, there are three possibilities as to what happened in this case: a) ID was produced and police acted inappropriately, b) ID was not produced, police acted appropriately, and Mr Gates is throwing out the "race card" to try to get out of the situation, or c) police acted appropriately in THIS situation, but Mr Gates behaved out of past frustration. The more that I look at the facts as I have seen them, I am starting to think that Option C is most likely.
Having a lot of diverse friends from many races and cultures, I like to generally think in terms of ways that we are all similar in many experiences that we share. I usually prefer to think of the America of 2009 as being so much easier for me, as a Black man, than it was for my parents. Much more of American society embraces racial equally than ever before. However, we can't forget that we are only one generation removed from government mandated racism, so we can't be completely surprised when racism rears its ugly head today. In my forty years, there have been several occasions where I, and people I know, have been detained by law enforcement when doing nothing wrong. I've had an officer draw his gun on me, thinking I was the criminal, when I was the one reporting the incident. So...it happens...it does happen.
And the unfortunate truth is that when something like that happens, more often than not, the fraternity of police sticks together. This is in NO way an indictment of all, or even most police officers. I'm sure that most of them go about doing their jobs in the proper fashion. However, there are some out there who abuse their authority to perpetuate their racist views, and it's really hard to get one officer to speak out against another. To me, it sounds like Mr Gates may have had some previous dealings with police that may have been unfair, and when this situation occurred, he reacted to his history of treatment, and not so much to the incident at hand.
Again...that's just my opinion. None of us knows exactly what happened in Cambridge. So remember that before you rush to judge either party in the situation.
Police Behavior...Part 1
**Warning: Possible Controversial Opinion**
So I've been reading the details of the Cambridge, MA arrest of the African American professor in his home. I am torn in my feelings, because what I feel is the key to the actions that took place, is in question.
I've read the police report, I've read the arresting officer's account of what occurred, I've even read Mr. Gates' account of what happened, and none of them mentioned that Mr. Gates initially produced ID as to his identity and proof that he lived at that location. Only Mr. Gates' lawyer has stated that identification was produced immediately in the situation. In my mind, that's the key to why the police acted how they did in THIS situation.
As a homeowner, I would think that Mr. Gates would be glad that police were so quick to respond to reports of someone breaking into his home. The police were there to investigate what they believed was a crime, and acted accordingly. If, in fact Mr. Gates did not produce identification, then the police were well within their rights, and did not deserve to be treated how they were treated.
What troubles me is the thought process of Mr. Gates in the first place. He is a professor, so he is obviously a bright man. He was said to have been returning from a trip to China, and "broke in" because he couldn't find his keys. I don't know about there, but in my neighborhood, folks look out for each other, so knowing that Gates was out of town, a neighbor could've been quick to pick up the phone to protect his neighbor's house. How could've it have been handled better? If you are going off to a foreign country, leave a key with a neighbor. If you realize that you are locked out, call the police to get them to help you get into the house.
From all evidence that I've read, Mr Gates could've done so many things differently, to have avoided this particular situation...
So I've been reading the details of the Cambridge, MA arrest of the African American professor in his home. I am torn in my feelings, because what I feel is the key to the actions that took place, is in question.
I've read the police report, I've read the arresting officer's account of what occurred, I've even read Mr. Gates' account of what happened, and none of them mentioned that Mr. Gates initially produced ID as to his identity and proof that he lived at that location. Only Mr. Gates' lawyer has stated that identification was produced immediately in the situation. In my mind, that's the key to why the police acted how they did in THIS situation.
As a homeowner, I would think that Mr. Gates would be glad that police were so quick to respond to reports of someone breaking into his home. The police were there to investigate what they believed was a crime, and acted accordingly. If, in fact Mr. Gates did not produce identification, then the police were well within their rights, and did not deserve to be treated how they were treated.
What troubles me is the thought process of Mr. Gates in the first place. He is a professor, so he is obviously a bright man. He was said to have been returning from a trip to China, and "broke in" because he couldn't find his keys. I don't know about there, but in my neighborhood, folks look out for each other, so knowing that Gates was out of town, a neighbor could've been quick to pick up the phone to protect his neighbor's house. How could've it have been handled better? If you are going off to a foreign country, leave a key with a neighbor. If you realize that you are locked out, call the police to get them to help you get into the house.
From all evidence that I've read, Mr Gates could've done so many things differently, to have avoided this particular situation...
Saturday, June 27, 2009
MJ Karma
You know me...I'm not afraid to take an unpopular stand, so here we go.
It is no secret that I am a believer in karma. Well, that five letter word has been in my mind over the past couple of days. Be it television, radio, or online, just about every media outlet has been saturated with coverage of the death of Michael Jackson. I saw a distraught fan on television say, "I can't believe he's gone! Why would God take such a talented soul from us so soon?!" Without hesitation, I blurted out, "Karma!"
In my opinion (and MY opinion is the very reason that I have a blog) Michael Jackson was a tremendous talent. He was blessed with the gift of musical communication. There are some folks who can "sing" and some folks who communicate when they deliver songs. MJ's music was delivered in such a fashion that it attracted fans from every corner of society. Those who appreciated his music spanned all strata of people regardless of ethnicity, wealth or religion. He was a true "performer" in that when he developed his stage shows, it was equally important to be visually and musically satisfied. The singing, the dancing, the production...they were all things that you could count on when you bought a ticket to an MJ concert. There can be very little debate that MJ was a very special individual, and that his body housed a unique God-given talent. His body was the vessel chosen to share this talent with the world.
How did he choose to show his appreciation for the gifts that he was given? By taking it into his own hands to alter and carve up the vessel for that talent to look like what he THOUGHT he wanted. I say "thought" because it is very obvious that MJ had more than one plastic surgery, meaning that after the first time, he still wasn't happy with how he looked, so he went back for more. To me it was like he was addressing God by saying, "Ok, so...thanks for that whole talented singer and dancer thing, but you clearly messed up when you made my nose and my chin. Oh, and my skin color? Cmon...what were you thinking?" And finally, God responded by saying, "Oh well, if you're that unhappy with how I've made you, you don't need to be on Earth any longer."
Karma.
It is no secret that I am a believer in karma. Well, that five letter word has been in my mind over the past couple of days. Be it television, radio, or online, just about every media outlet has been saturated with coverage of the death of Michael Jackson. I saw a distraught fan on television say, "I can't believe he's gone! Why would God take such a talented soul from us so soon?!" Without hesitation, I blurted out, "Karma!"
In my opinion (and MY opinion is the very reason that I have a blog) Michael Jackson was a tremendous talent. He was blessed with the gift of musical communication. There are some folks who can "sing" and some folks who communicate when they deliver songs. MJ's music was delivered in such a fashion that it attracted fans from every corner of society. Those who appreciated his music spanned all strata of people regardless of ethnicity, wealth or religion. He was a true "performer" in that when he developed his stage shows, it was equally important to be visually and musically satisfied. The singing, the dancing, the production...they were all things that you could count on when you bought a ticket to an MJ concert. There can be very little debate that MJ was a very special individual, and that his body housed a unique God-given talent. His body was the vessel chosen to share this talent with the world.
How did he choose to show his appreciation for the gifts that he was given? By taking it into his own hands to alter and carve up the vessel for that talent to look like what he THOUGHT he wanted. I say "thought" because it is very obvious that MJ had more than one plastic surgery, meaning that after the first time, he still wasn't happy with how he looked, so he went back for more. To me it was like he was addressing God by saying, "Ok, so...thanks for that whole talented singer and dancer thing, but you clearly messed up when you made my nose and my chin. Oh, and my skin color? Cmon...what were you thinking?" And finally, God responded by saying, "Oh well, if you're that unhappy with how I've made you, you don't need to be on Earth any longer."
Karma.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
S.H.
I was subjected to a Sexual Harrassment Training class today at work. Let's put aside the fact that I work in an office with only heterosexual males, I went into the training with an open mind. I came away really annoyed at my company's policies regarding SH.
The trainer spent 90% of the time focusing on the male harrassing female scenarios, when it is my belief that a strong woman in a corporate setting is much more dangerous with regard to SH. She knows that in today's society, management is much less likely to believe a woman has harrassed a man, so she could more easily get away with it.
But anyway, there were two examples that specifically frosted my tailfeathers. The trainer said that if an employee came to her and said "I wanted you to be aware that ___ has harrassed me. I don't want you to take any action towards him/her, but I just wanted you to know." In our company, as a manager, she is REQUIRED to file a report against the accused, because she has been made aware of the SH incident. Even if the accuser specifically asks that no action be taken, the manager is not allowed to use personal judgement, and must file a report. That's stupid!
The other example is that we are all "strongly encouraged" to report incidents of SH that we witness, even if it does not involve us directly. WTF?? How can you sufficiently determine if someone else has been harrassed? Suppose you are raised in a rather strict environment were certain touching is inappropriate, and you happened to see one co-worker touch another in a way that YOU feel is inappropriate, but the other two involved have no issue with it at all. How are you going to TELL someone that they are a victim of SH when they don't feel offended??
The final straw, for me, was this lil tidbit. If someone has filed an SH claim against you, you aren't allowed to even say "Why didn't you just come to me and say that you were offended," because our company views that as a potential threat to the accuser. So, to me, that says that instead of talking things out and resolving the matter in a quiet "adult" fashion, your first course of action should be to run like a tattle-tale whenever you see something that might be interpreted as SH. Sheesh!!
The trainer spent 90% of the time focusing on the male harrassing female scenarios, when it is my belief that a strong woman in a corporate setting is much more dangerous with regard to SH. She knows that in today's society, management is much less likely to believe a woman has harrassed a man, so she could more easily get away with it.
But anyway, there were two examples that specifically frosted my tailfeathers. The trainer said that if an employee came to her and said "I wanted you to be aware that ___ has harrassed me. I don't want you to take any action towards him/her, but I just wanted you to know." In our company, as a manager, she is REQUIRED to file a report against the accused, because she has been made aware of the SH incident. Even if the accuser specifically asks that no action be taken, the manager is not allowed to use personal judgement, and must file a report. That's stupid!
The other example is that we are all "strongly encouraged" to report incidents of SH that we witness, even if it does not involve us directly. WTF?? How can you sufficiently determine if someone else has been harrassed? Suppose you are raised in a rather strict environment were certain touching is inappropriate, and you happened to see one co-worker touch another in a way that YOU feel is inappropriate, but the other two involved have no issue with it at all. How are you going to TELL someone that they are a victim of SH when they don't feel offended??
The final straw, for me, was this lil tidbit. If someone has filed an SH claim against you, you aren't allowed to even say "Why didn't you just come to me and say that you were offended," because our company views that as a potential threat to the accuser. So, to me, that says that instead of talking things out and resolving the matter in a quiet "adult" fashion, your first course of action should be to run like a tattle-tale whenever you see something that might be interpreted as SH. Sheesh!!
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Personal Accountability
I can't stand what I call "Reactive Parents!" What I mean is the type that makes a big fuss about defending their child when they feel the child has been wronged, instead of possibly doing some productive parenting ahead of time to have potentially avoided the situation. Today I'll address a pair of specific examples in the news recently.
You may have seen the recent story regarding "Sexting" that led to a girl's suicide. First of all, you may not agree, but in MY opinion, when a youth commits suicide, the parents have failed to convey some measure of love to that child. If you have properly shown your child that they have unconditional love from their family, and have taught that child the proper respect for life, there is nothing that can get them so distraught that they'll resort to suicide. In this particular case, the young lady took some suggestive photos with her cell phone camera and sent them to a friend. Somehow, those photos got circulated throughout her peers and she became unbearably embarrassed, and took her own life. Her parents have actually filed a lawsuit against her school for not doing enough to keep her from being harassed by the other students.
Is it just me or does anyone else believe that the whole matter of culpability lies in the fact that she took the pictures and sent them herself?!! The pictures weren't secretly taken or stolen by someone else. SHE took nude photos of herself, and SHE sent them to a friend. You can say that the friend wasn't supposed to share the photos with others, but the fact remains that had there been no photos in the first place, they couldn't have been shared! Instead of "reacting" by filing lawsuits after their daughter's death, maybe the parents' time could've been better spent teaching their daughter the possible consequences of taking nude photos.
And then there's Yearbook Mom. I saw a story the other day about a mother and daughter who didn't like the daughter's yearbook picture and wanted the school to stop distribution of the yearbook, and have it reprinted without the questionable photo. Here's their story...
The student knew yearbook pictures were being taken, so she decided not to wear underwear that day so the photos wouldn't show pantylines. When the photo was published, there is some question as to whether her bare crotch could be seen. The student and her mother believe it is visible, while the school maintains that it's merely a shadow. Shadow or not, now the girl is horribly embarrassed and her mother is outraged, and wants action taken.
Again, I go back to the choice that the student made for herself. She KNEW photos would be taken, and thought ahead enough to try to avoid pantylines, yet it never occurred to her to make sure she wore a dress of appropriate length?? My first question as a parent would've been to my daughter, asking "Why were you wearing a dress that short? You thought to make sure a line wouldn't show through your clothes, but never thought that maybe you should make sure your genitalia was covered??"
Where is personal accountability these days? Instead of running to the nearest authority and proclaiming how you've been wronged, how about taking a moment to step back and think how you may have prevented the situation from occurring in the first place.
You may have seen the recent story regarding "Sexting" that led to a girl's suicide. First of all, you may not agree, but in MY opinion, when a youth commits suicide, the parents have failed to convey some measure of love to that child. If you have properly shown your child that they have unconditional love from their family, and have taught that child the proper respect for life, there is nothing that can get them so distraught that they'll resort to suicide. In this particular case, the young lady took some suggestive photos with her cell phone camera and sent them to a friend. Somehow, those photos got circulated throughout her peers and she became unbearably embarrassed, and took her own life. Her parents have actually filed a lawsuit against her school for not doing enough to keep her from being harassed by the other students.
Is it just me or does anyone else believe that the whole matter of culpability lies in the fact that she took the pictures and sent them herself?!! The pictures weren't secretly taken or stolen by someone else. SHE took nude photos of herself, and SHE sent them to a friend. You can say that the friend wasn't supposed to share the photos with others, but the fact remains that had there been no photos in the first place, they couldn't have been shared! Instead of "reacting" by filing lawsuits after their daughter's death, maybe the parents' time could've been better spent teaching their daughter the possible consequences of taking nude photos.
And then there's Yearbook Mom. I saw a story the other day about a mother and daughter who didn't like the daughter's yearbook picture and wanted the school to stop distribution of the yearbook, and have it reprinted without the questionable photo. Here's their story...
The student knew yearbook pictures were being taken, so she decided not to wear underwear that day so the photos wouldn't show pantylines. When the photo was published, there is some question as to whether her bare crotch could be seen. The student and her mother believe it is visible, while the school maintains that it's merely a shadow. Shadow or not, now the girl is horribly embarrassed and her mother is outraged, and wants action taken.
Again, I go back to the choice that the student made for herself. She KNEW photos would be taken, and thought ahead enough to try to avoid pantylines, yet it never occurred to her to make sure she wore a dress of appropriate length?? My first question as a parent would've been to my daughter, asking "Why were you wearing a dress that short? You thought to make sure a line wouldn't show through your clothes, but never thought that maybe you should make sure your genitalia was covered??"
Where is personal accountability these days? Instead of running to the nearest authority and proclaiming how you've been wronged, how about taking a moment to step back and think how you may have prevented the situation from occurring in the first place.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Be Positive
The weather in my area has been quite beautiful lately. Wherever you may be, I have a task for you to accomplish the next time you look outside and notice how beautiful the weather is. I know that many of us have crazy schedules and work keeps you busy, but just slow down, take five minutes of time alone to sit and think about what you are thankful for.
If you commit to doing it, the task is not very difficult. Maybe take a walk during your lunch break, sit quietly in the car before you pull out of the parking lot, find a nearby park...whatever you have to do, just do it.
We all have something to be thankful for! Without getting too spiritual, you can be thankful that you have a loving family, thankful that you have/had caring parents, thankful that you have an income during this strained economy.
On the surface, you may think that this is a silly exercise, but you'd be amazed at how much better you feel when you take a moment to focus on the positives in your life. So often, we get caught up in the negatives and the stress around us, that we forget about the wonderful things that we have access to in our lives.
I watched the news recently and saw the story of David Kellermann, acting CFO of Fannie Mae, who took his own life. I watched as they wheeled his body out of his $900k home, and instantly thought "I'm sure that there are people less than 15 minutes from that house, who fight everyday to live on the streets with no home, and THIS man thought his life was so bad that he had nothing to live for?!" Ask yourself...do you think Mr. Kellermann ever stopped to think about what he had to be thankful for?
If you commit to doing it, the task is not very difficult. Maybe take a walk during your lunch break, sit quietly in the car before you pull out of the parking lot, find a nearby park...whatever you have to do, just do it.
We all have something to be thankful for! Without getting too spiritual, you can be thankful that you have a loving family, thankful that you have/had caring parents, thankful that you have an income during this strained economy.
On the surface, you may think that this is a silly exercise, but you'd be amazed at how much better you feel when you take a moment to focus on the positives in your life. So often, we get caught up in the negatives and the stress around us, that we forget about the wonderful things that we have access to in our lives.
I watched the news recently and saw the story of David Kellermann, acting CFO of Fannie Mae, who took his own life. I watched as they wheeled his body out of his $900k home, and instantly thought "I'm sure that there are people less than 15 minutes from that house, who fight everyday to live on the streets with no home, and THIS man thought his life was so bad that he had nothing to live for?!" Ask yourself...do you think Mr. Kellermann ever stopped to think about what he had to be thankful for?
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