My Father In Law

When I originally sat down, I was about to blog about the Super Bowl, but now that will have to wait until the next blog. Suddenly the Super Bowl seems a lot less important after the phone call that I just had with my wife.

To tell the story properly, we have to back up just a bit. For the past six months, my father in law has been having some circulatory problems with his feet. There was some concern that it had to do with his diabetes, so he was being good about sticking to his diet, and increasing his exercise regimen. However, his feet were continuing to worsen. When he and my mother in law came in town (they live in Ocean City) for Cmas, he had trouble even walking. It had gotten so painful that my brother in law had to drive them back home, so my father in law wouldn't have to drive. They left here the Saturday evening after Cmas, and on Monday, my FIL had a doctor's appointment. Well, that appointment led to him having to be immediately admittedly to the hospital, which eventually led to him having some toes removed. He has been in rehab, but of course, this is a lot for him to handle, mentally.

So, my wife just called me and said that she just talked to her brother. The hospital called him to say that my FIL was severely dehydrated, nearly in a diabetic coma state, and to avoid having infection spread, they have to perform emergency amputation on both of his feet.

No matter how hard I try, I can not fathom going to sleep, and then waking up to find my feet are gone. I can't imagine the type of mental strength that it would take to get through that kind of trauma. My FIL is retired Army, retired Baltimore City Govt engineer, active in community and local government issues. For 20 years, he's been the busiest retiree I've ever seen! Always on the go...always independent. And now, from this day forward, life has changed. He will have to learn to accept help from others to do most things that have always been elementary.

To be blatantly honest, what worries me the most is his attitude. My father in law is over 80 years old. He's always been an active and proud man, and a strong leader. I'm scared that he will view this physical setback as a defeating blow, instead of simply an obstacle to overcome. He has many days of rehab ahead of him, just to be able to do basic things on his own again, and I worry that he'll choose not to fight. I worry that he'll think "I'm over 80. I've had a good life. I'm too tired to do the work necessary to get back out there. Just let me fade away quietly." I don't think of him as that type of person, but you never know how you'll react, until faced with the situation.My father in law